Have you ever had those days when you just have to plaster on a fake smile and paint a phony day that sounds amazing? *Sigh* Yeah, me too.
No one wants to hear the crappy stuff that has happened to you, right? Or, that you can’t explain exactly why to them, but you just simply feel blue. For no reason at all. Everything’s great. You just have a burning desire to hide from the world and crawl back in bed and not come out until tomorrow.
I have some interesting news in terms of what this means about you … you’re normal. This is a natural thing to feel sometimes. There. I said it. As a coach, I am supposed to tell you that life is made of candy trees and sweet perspectives, right? Absolutely not. My job is actually to tell you the truth. Not the sugar coated version, but the real reality. And the truth is sometimes you are standing in your own way but sometimes days are just plain hard. Motivation is nowhere to be found and your personality has abandoned you, your happy disposition is playing hooky and your positive outlook is out looking for someone more positive. Eh. It happens.
As a coach, I used to beat myself up about this when it happened. I felt guilty because I “had better tools to deal” or “knew what to do to turn it around” or “knew that I was getting in my own way of manifesting what I really wanted.” Bull honky. (I’ve never said that term before in my life.) Some days just stink.
What I am trying to get at is that being unhappy sometimes is normal. I feel like our society is striving to be happy 100% of the time. That just isn’t reality. And you aren’t failing at life (how dramatic does that sound) if you are unhappy sometimes. It’s natural. Bad days happen. You aren’t perfect. Personally, I think we need to feel ALIVE to be happy. So, if I want to kick my blues, I do something that makes me feel alive. But, truthfully, sometimes I just want to feel like a zombie and veg out in front the couch with my cranky pants on. There’s no shame in that. At least not in my world. I hope not in yours either. A day or two here or there is okay. Any longer and it might be time to start looking at the root cause.
Random fact: I love the saying “some days you’re the windshield. And some days you’re the bug.” I totally buy that.
What I have found is that if I am experiencing more days than not when I’m sporting my cranky pants, I often have something else going on entirely than just a funky day. For instance, a few causes might be:
- I am purposefully avoiding something that I need to do that feels scary or overwhelming. I.E. I feel bad about myself for not accomplishing my goal but I’m too scared or overwhelmed to start it.
- I am avoiding an important discussion and not fully expressing what I am feeling. Maybe I am mad at someone or allowing myself to be taken advantage of. Whatever the case, I’m not speaking my truth and asking for what I need.
- I’m just outright bored or lonely. I.E. I need to get out of the house or figure out something to do that will make me feel alive.
- I have just accomplished something awesome. A great friend pointed out to me yesterday that often when she has been on a good roll, a mediocre roll follows it. Kind of like hitting a peak and then life returns to normal. Ho hum. Where did all the excitement go, right?
It is important for me to point out here that I am no psychologist. And, I am not talking about depression or any other disorder. If you are worried that the cycle of blues is lasting wayyy too long, I really recommend finding a therapist in your area to talk to. Therapy is AWESOME and talented and can really help you get answers.
Forgive yourself for the days you feel blue. I am here to tell you that they are okay and they are normal. Sometimes they are just that…a bad day…other times they are here to signal a lesson for us. If you want to kick the bad mood, just ask yourself what would make you happiest right now? To be with friends? To take a nap? To get a massage? To eat an amazing meal? Not to escape from reality, but to truly add joy to your life and feel more ALIVE. Go do it. Go be you. Those blues will lift in no time. And, if you want to veg out and rock your cranky pants, that’s fine by me, too!
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Peace, love and momentum,
MOMENTUM CHALLENGE: Treat yourself to something this month. Whether it’s a massage, a pricey meal, a new suit or a full day of not working, do something just for YOU!
Final chance for Fall playtime!