You’re human. You deal with boundaries, limits and fears every day. If you say you don’t, you’re lying to yourself.
Part of our reason for being alive (or at least feeling truly alive) is stretching what we think we are capable of, asking more of ourselves, taking chances and stepping into the unknown. Sometimes this happens in relationships, our careers, our friendships or even just personal decisions we make to try something new.
A few years ago, I trained out at the US National Whitewater Center here in Charlotte as a ropes course facilitator. I never intended to work there, but I felt drawn to the idea of being able to guide people across ropes and through obstacles (no surprise there, I guess!). One of the last obstacles for our team to learn was “the wall.” The wall was a series of planks nailed to vertical posts that created a 12 foot completely vertical, non climbable wall. Our mission was to use a max of three people on the ground and two people at the top of the wall to get everyone over successfully. This went fairly quickly until we reached our last three people on the ground, then came to a grinding halt with our last guy. As high as he strived to jump, we just couldn’t reach his hands from the top to pull him over. As lunch time drew closer and dozens of repeated attempts failed, we asked if we had to keep trying until we succeeded or if we could give up. Our facilitators left the choice up to us. Being stubborn humans, we just couldn’t give up on ourselves. So, we decided to use the power of the collective team. We began using what we could to empower our teammate. Everyone who had made it over began whooping, clapping and cheering as much support as we could possibly send his way.
Within two attempts he was able to jump high enough for us to pull him over the wall. It was an extraordinary moment for my awareness of the power of support and belief in someone.
I often use this story during my climbing retreats as well. Many of the women who come on these retreats have never climbed before, so when they are alone on the wall, fears and doubts emerge. My only request during this time is that they ask for support from the rest of us. Asking is SO important, because sometimes you want to work through it alone and sometimes you want the support but you’re too stubborn or scared to ask for it. Asking for support is not a weakness. Once the request is made, that’s when all of us on the ground use our voices to empower and boost the climber. What an amazing difference it makes every time. When you’ve given up on yourself, or doubt begins to set in, having someone (or a lot of someone’s) hold the belief for you and to reinforce it can literally lift you up higher, stronger and faster.
I witnessed this again while at a baseball game the other night. Our team was lagging and the announcer asked for us to make some noise. We raised our voices, clapped our hands and BAM! The next hit was outta the park.
I experience this when I’m with clients, too. It’s scary to make big, personal changes. It’s hard to feel failure before success. It’s uncomfortable to step into the unknown. That’s why I am so grateful to be able to hold the space for hope, their bigger vision and a better life for each of my clients. And I also hold so, so much pride for them when they get there.
What I ask of you going forward is that you push through when you need to prove to yourself that you can push through (I get it). But even more so that you ask for support when you’re just done attempting to do it all alone.
Support doesn’t have to be help – it can simply be some verbal affirmation and belief that…
- You’ve got this.
- You’re more than capable.
- You’re worthy.
- Someone has your back.
- You will get up and over that wall.
Because you can. And you do have this.
Go, go go!
Ever need a little support? I’ve got your back! Pop over to the Facebook page to ask for it. Or, shoot me an email! I always love to hear from you and I would be happy to send you a little e-love to support your happiness!
Peace, love and momentum,
MOMENTUM CHALLENGE: Summer is the season of play. So, get out there and exercise your playful muscles. Enjoy nature, take a dip in the lake, get outside at sunset, get excited at a sports game, play in the creek…whatever your happy place is, get out there and enjoy it!